Thursday, 21 January 2016
I am worthy!
I've been taking part in an online yoga camp since the beginning of the year and I have found it soooo beneficial! I got my period yesterday and for the few days leading up to it, I noted that I hadn't been visited by my usual rage monster. I definitely think yoga camp has something to do with this, so for me it has been really great. Some days are harder than others to find the motivation to roll out the yoga mat and it does mean that my days feel busier as I try to squeeze everything in, but I will say that I never regret making the time for it.
Everyday there's a new "mantra" that you are supposed to repeat throughout the practice. You can take this or leave it but I've been trying to take it on board. Some of them are easier to believe than others. Today's mantra made me emotional though, and I even shed a few tears. It was "I am worthy". When I tried to apply it to my life, the first thing I thought of was work....I am worthy of the promotion and raise that has been denied to me for the past couple of years. Whatever - I'm over it. I'm biding my time there at this stage. About halfway through the practice, however, the notion of being worthy of motherhood came into my head and overwhelmed me slightly! It's true though....I am worthy. Just as worthy as anyone else of having a baby. I'm going to keep reminding myself of this and hope that it breeds positivity in me.
As I said before, today is CD2 for me. My next CD1 is the start of IVF. I'm so nervous and a little bit excited to start. Mainly nervous, if I'm being honest. I will definitely keep up the yoga on a regular basis once this camp has finished. Maybe not every day, but several times a week at least. I've also started acupuncture. This my third foray into acupuncture and this practitioner is by far my favourite. I felt great after my first session and in a couple of weeks, I'm going to start going twice a week. It's expensive, but I feel like it could be worthwhile, even if it just helps me to sleep better and feel more chilled out. Hopefully it'll do more than that though.
So far 2016 has been going pretty okay...I just hope it continues on the same way. Namaste!